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Q: We just recently purchased a new home. It has hardwood entry/kitchen and carpet throughout. Is it rude to ask people to remove their shoes when coming into the house? We have place a chair on the front porch to assist those when removing their shoes. We both find it very comfortable to make the [...]
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Q: I recently asked a couple from church to go out with my husband and I. They asked us just to come to their house for dinner. Since I invited them, I did not want them to have to go through the trouble of working on their house and cooking. So, I said a restaurant [...]
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Q: My Aunt gave me a wall hanging that is not my taste, at all. She has suggested many different places for it. Now she is coming to my house. What should I do? A: Since you still have it, you might as well hang it up so she can see it in place. When [...]
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Q: When guests are asked to bring food to a party (hors d’oeuvre, cookies, salad, etc.) are they then required to reciprocate the invitation? Generally if someone invites me to a party and they provide the food, I reciprocate by asking them to my house for dinner. If I’m asked to bring something, I don’t [...]
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Q: If a guest brings a bouquet or a fine bottle of wine to a dinner party, does the hostess owe her a thank-you card? A: Not if she expressed her appreciation the night of the event. But at some larger functions, guests might not get a chance to present the hostess with their offering [...]
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Q: My husband and I have friends who often stop by our home unannounced and then stay for hours. Isn’t this rude? A: Unannounced visits are always inconsiderate unless the parties have agreed in advance that they’re OK. Don’t just fume. Let your friends know you’d prefer a phone call before they pop in. Say [...]
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Q: Two of my cousins had a fight years ago and haven’t spoken since. I want to invite both to my son’s birthday party. How do I handle it? A: You can invite both–but it should not be a surprise reunion. Talk to them separately, letting each one know you’d like him to come to [...]
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Q: My husband’s cousins are coming in from England and will be staying with us for seven nights. We can’t take that much vacation time, but can we ask our visitors to be self-sufficient? A: Since they’ll be staying a whole week, I can’t imagine these guests expect you to drop everything. Still, it’s best [...]
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Q: Chatting with a pal on the phone, I mentioned an upcoming party hosted by a mutual friend — and she had no idea what I was talking about. I figured she’d be invited! Now what? A: Sounds like you’ve had an “open mouth, insert foot” moment. But don’t be too upset–you should be able [...]
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Q: A friend invited me to a Tupperware party she’s hosting, but I don’t need any more containers. Should I go anyway? And must I buy something? A: While you might want to support your friend emotionally in her venture, you shouldn’t feel obligated to support her financially or even to attend the party at [...]
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The Gift of Good Manners
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