Q. My husband and I are both vegetarian and have been invited to a wedding where the RSVP asks us to select salmon or chicken for our meal. Should we just check a meat option and then eat whatever veggies are available once we’re there (wasting the meat), or do we let them know that we won’t be having meat (and save them $). Will that place pressure on them to make a main course veggie option? We are more than happy to eat before the meal, but we’re not sure how to address the situation on the RSVP.
A. Since you were given two choices, you should pick one and just not eat the fish or chicken. In all likelihood, there will be enough other food, such as hors d’oeuvres, salad, bread, vegetables, etc. for you to eat. It would be improper to tell you hosts that you don’t eat meat. Since reception costs are often based on the number of attending, not the number of meals eaten, it would not save them money. To eat beforehand and not eat any dinner at the reception could be awkward for those seated at your table.