Open Thread

Welcome to the Etiquette Daily

This open thread is your space to use as you like. We invite you to discuss current and traditional etiquette. Feel free to ask questions of each other and the community moderators here.

What’s the Deal With Meals? : Is it appropriate to order for your date?

Q. When I take my significant other out to dinner at a restaurant, I believe it is proper for her to tell me her choice from the menu and for me to order for her when the waiter arrives. She believes I am a controlling, sexist Neanderthal. Who is correct?

A. According to the Post Survey, three out of five women do not want men to order a meal for them at a restaurant. So you need to be absolutely sure how the person you are with feels about this issue before going ahead and ordering for her. Yours is the case where the rule itself matters not at all. What really matters is the confidence and courtesy you show by knowing how the other person wishes to be treated, and treating her accordingly.

Open Thread

Welcome to the Etiquette Daily

This open thread is your space to use as you like. We invite you to discuss current and traditional etiquette. Feel free to ask questions of each other and the community moderators here.

Seating Situation : Where to seat people at a wedding?

Q. My question is in reference to a wedding rehearsal dinner. What should be the seating
arrangement at the head table for the groom’s mother, stepfather, biological father and guest, bride’s mother and father? Is there any certain order that we should sit? We will be at the long square type table and is it suitable for the mother of the groom to do a speech and toast at the dinner instead of the groom’s father?

A. Former spouses should not be seated next to each other. At a long rectangular table, it would be best to seat the groom’s mother and stepfather at one end and his biological father and guest at the other end.

Yes, it is suitable for the mother of the groom to give the first toast instead of the groom’s father, if the groom approves.