Picking Favorites: Is it Ok to Only Invite Specific Coworkers to Your Wedding?

Q: I am getting married and want to know if it is okay to invite some of my colleagues but not others? I am a school counselor and work in a school with over 100 employees. As you can see, if only half came and brought a spouse/guest, I would have 100 guests from work. The chosen venues is limited to 250 people and my fiance and I have large families. It is not my intention to exclude anyone but inviting everyone is nearly impossible.

A: The best way to compile your list of work friends is to begin with only those where your friendship extends outside of school. This may just be a handful, or even only one or two, but that is fine and no one’s feelings would be hurt not to be included. If there are a few others who you consider close friends even though you don’t socialize outside of the school environment, you might add them if you have space. You have no obligation to invite your entire group of work colleagues, even if they have a celebration or shower for you in school. This is their way of celebrating your marriage with no expectation of also being invited to your wedding. Best wishes!

Drinks without Dinner: Is it bad to Host an Evening Wedding Without a Sit-down Meal?

Q: Is it wrong to have a 6:00 pm wedding and not serve a sit down dinner?

A: Well, people would expect a meal, so if you are not serving one, you need to make it clear. One way to do this is to write:

“Cocktail Reception Immediately Following”

and keep your reception hours short, because people will be hungry and will want to leave and have dinner elsewhere if you are not serving it.

Dancing Do’s and Dont’s: Correct Dance Order at Wedding Receptions

Q: What is correct dance order for receptions -groom and bride- then who dances with whom?

A: In many traditions, the bride and groom dance the first dance. For the second musical number, traditionally the father of the groom dances with the bride, and then the bride’s father cuts in. The groom dances with his new mother-in-law and then his mother. Then the groom’s father might dance with the bride’s mother and the bride’s father with the groom’s mother, while the groom dances with the maid of honor and the bride with the best man. At this point other guests usually join them on the dance floor.

When family relationships are complicated, everyone can join the couple after their first dance. The newlyweds should then make a point to dance with all parents and stepparents at some time during the reception.

Remaining Rings: Is it proper to Wear Wedding Rings Once Widowed?

Q: Is there a recommended protocol for wearing wedding rings after being widowed?

A: You may wear your rings for the rest of your life, or remove them immediately, as you wish. It is entirely a personal decision. If you are going to remarry at some point, you would remove the rings that symbolize your previous marriage, but otherwise you wear them or not, as you choose.