From the category archives:
Q: I am having a dinner party and am trying to find out the proper placement of my china, silver, and crystal. A: Dinner plate: This is the “hub of the wheel” and usually the first thing to be on the table. Two forks: The forks are placed to the left of the plate. The [...]
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Q: We’ve been invited to several holiday parties this year. Is it okay to “double-book”? A: This is one of those times when it’s fine to double-book and go from one holiday party to another. The casual, drop-in nature of most holiday parties makes this okay. Just be sure you do each event justice — [...]
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Q:We are invited to a holiday party. The invitations were sent out by email. In the invitation/email , it states that the couple hosting the party would like all guests to bring specific items – such as specific food – and all liquor. They even state that the liquor and food are to picked up [...]
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Q: Every year, my mother-in-law insists on planning the entire Thanksgiving meal- and then complains about the workload. Should I stay out of the way or continue to offer my help? A: You have two good options: One is: Sit back, praise away- “You’ve outdone yourself again!”- and send a handwritten thank-you note afterward. Or, [...]
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Q: You invite a friend to join your for Thanksgiving. She accepts but doesn’t offer to bring anything. Do you ask her to contribute? A: Yes. Families celebrate in different ways and your friend might not be used to potluck. But if that’s your style, just let her know. Request something general, like an appetizer, [...]
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Q: My brother’s new girlfriend is loud, tells off-color jokes- and is coming to our Thanksgiving dinner this year. What’s the best way to handle her? A: Chat with your brother ahead of time. Say, “I’m happy you and Lisa are coming for Thanksgiving, but can you talk to her about toning down the jokes? [...]
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Q: We’re hosting Thanksgiving dinner for a slew of our out-of-town relatives. Is it OK to ask some to stay at a hotel? A: Preparing a Thanksgiving feast is a major enough undertaking without adding a gaggle of overnight guests. If you wish, and your situation permits, you can invite relatives from farther away to [...]
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Q: I hosted a small dinner for friends. One of the couples was 2 hours late and said nothing about it (no apology, etc). I said nothing and still have not mentioned it to them. Should I have said or done anything about their tardiness? A: It may be that they got the time wrong, [...]
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Q: My neighbor came over for takeout pizza, but she didn’t have cash to help pay for it. Do I ask her to pay me back? A: Yes, if dutch treat was the plan. First, give her a chance to make amends. If she continues to “forget,” there’s not much you can do, so ask [...]
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Q: For the last several years and again this year we have hosted an annual open house. We have mailed invitations with an RSVP and the first phone call came today. She asked, “I will have a guest, is it all right if I bring her?” Last year we ended up with 6 extra people [...]
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The Gift of Good Manners
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