From the category archives:
Q: My boyfriend and I just bought our first house together and some of our friends/relatives are telling us we should have a housewarming party. I always thought that someone else was supposed to plan and throw the party for you at the new house and that you’re not supposed to throw it for yourself. [...]
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Q: What should you do when a dinner guest arrives with a prepared dessert that you’d rather not serve that evening? This happened to me recently, and although I didn’t want to hurt my guest’s feelings, the surprise upset my plans. I told her I’d serve her dessert another time. A: If the unexpected gift [...]
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Q: My siblings and I are throwing an anniversary party for our parents. To keep costs down, we’d like to invite unattached relatives who are in their 20s without guests. Is that acceptable? A: You’re having an anniversary party, not a dating event. It’s commendable to consider your guests’ feelings, but I wouldn’t worry. It’s [...]
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Q: We recently bought a swing set for our four-year-old, but now neighborhood kids come over to play at all hours. How can we limit these visits? And should we be talking to the kids or their parents? A: Start with the parents. Discuss the issue in a friendly way, on the phone or face-to-face. [...]
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Q: My sister and I are both pregnant for the first time. Since our due dates are only one and a half months apart, we’d like to combine our baby showers if that’s appropriate. If so, should we draw up separate invitation lists? And how do we word the invitations so guests will know it’s [...]
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Q: Last year, we let some friends use our beach house – but they ate everything in sight and left the place a mess! They’ve asked for a weekend this year. Can we say no without hurting the friendship? A: You have every right to ban these sloppy folks from using your home. Be diplomatic [...]
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Q: At a friend’s dinner party last month, I got into an intense political debate with a few other guests I barely knew. Our exchange did not derail the party, but the hostess seemed uncomfortable, and later I wondered if we’d all been rude to have come out swinging. A: Intelligent discussion of an important, [...]
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Q: My bathrooms are being renovated, and the workers are here all day long. I don’t want to start serving them, but I find myself sneaking around and feeling guilty when I make myself coffee or lunch. Should I be offering them drinks or food when I’m having some? A: Here’s a way to think [...]
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Q: I’m planning to throw a fancy Fourth of July barbecue, and I hope to keep it an adult affair. How do I diplomatically let friends know that children aren’t invited? A: Start by addressing your invitations only to adults. You could also call invitees who have kids and say, “We thought it would be [...]
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Q: After a recent potluck dinner, I took the remains of my dish home. Later, I learned that the hostess – a friend – complained that she should have gotten the leftovers. Who’s right? A: To the victor belong the spoils, and to the potluck chef belong the leftovers – so you did no wrong [...]
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