Devious Date: Is it OK to uninvite a date who has been unfaithful?

Q: Several weeks ago I invited a man I thought I had been dating exclusively to a very special affair, which will be a ‘high profile’ fundraiser in my community.  Hundreds of people will attend, and I am on the board for this organization.  I have learned that he is now seeing someone else.  My question is can I uninvite him? To me that would be very rude, so I am struggling with the situation.

A: If he is seeing someone else, having given you the impression that you were dating exclusively, it is fine to uninvite him, for he has been untruthful. This is not acceptable in any relationship. Simply say that you are very sorry but the demands on your time will be so extensive during the event that you wouldn’t dream of asking him to accompany you and not be able to even see him for more than seconds at a time, so you are going to have to consider giving his ticket to someone who will be assisting you.



  1. Shane

    He should be un-invited because he was untruthful. But this answer is suggesting that you should then lie to him about the reason you’re un-inviting him. That’s not right either.

  2. Danielle

    I agree, you shouldn’t be untruthful. I would just tell him that you don’t want to see him anymore because of the unfaithfulness. The event would be enveloped by that. Sorry to hear about the guy being such a bummer. Maybe you will meet someone new and fabulous at the event!

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