Conflict Resolution: What can I do about my fiancé and bridesmaid “to-be” always fighting?

Q: I am having trouble with one of my to-be bridesmaids.  She and my fiancé argue constantly and she is becoming difficult to get along with.  My fiance and I have decided not to have her as a bridesmaid, but how do I tell her?  Hopefully without hurting her feelings, because she is my roommate.

A: Unfortunately, there is no way to ask her to “step down” without potentially hurting her feelings.  Perhaps you could ask her why she and your fiancé argue so much and to try to work out some kind of resolution.  You should try to be open-minded and not critical of her perspective.  If despite this attempt, your bridesmaid refuses to work out a solution with your fiancé, you may tell her that you don’t want to hurt her feelings but you think it might be better for her to reconsider being a bridesmaid and ask for her understanding.  It’s not fair for you to be in the position of referee when this time should be a happy one.

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