Duty Delegation: Who should give the bridal shower?

Q: Is it the bridesmaid’s duty or responsibility to give the bride a shower?  If not who should give it?

A: Contrary to common misconceptions, bridesmaids are not required to host a bridal shower, although they certainly may do so.  Friends of the bride and groom, friends of parents, and members of the wedding party other than the immediate family may host a shower, as may an office staff or other colleagues. Traditionally, the bride’s or groom’s immediate family members do not host a shower (doing so may appear self-serving), but these days it is happening more often. Under certain circumstances, for example, when a bride-to-be lives far away from her family or is visiting her future family prior to the wedding, the groom’s sisters or mother may correctly host the shower.


  1. kim

    Not really a comment,but question.My daughter is getting married,i am divorced from her father.My side of the family(her cousins,the bride) are having a bridal shower for her.Are they required to invite my exes,her dads side of the family to the shower,that is for my side of the family?

    • Elizabeth

      No, they are not required to do so. The women on the bride’s father’s side could hold a small family shower for her as well.

  2. Rosey O.

    Not a comment but a question. I know things have changed since I got married 41 years ago, but is it proper to ask people to give money towards the honeymoon instead of wedding gifts. I think this is tacky — yeah, I’m OLD!! Thanks so much!

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