1. Great discussion and also some very tactful answers were given.
    Being immigrants from the Old World we know about this dilemma first hand. We also spontaneously did bring over some gifts for nieces and nephews in our suitcases. This was at the time before 9/11 when we could take still two suitcases each with 32 kg maximum weight. We missed birthdays and other events so we just packed one suitcase full of gifts to hand out. But we had to stop this routine because of the very reason discussed above. It hurts when they show up and ASK for things. It sure is a lapse in etiquette and this never got corrected by their mother…
    This time and age, children are being gifted way too much anyway and that is not making them ready for any of life’s disappointments. With our downward economy they better did learn about tough times…
    Thanks for your efforts!
    Mariette’s Back to Basics

  2. Nina

    This issue just came up in my life! My friend pointed out that I brought her daughter a gift almost every time I saw her, and that perhaps I ought to make the gifts less frequent so that she would appreciate them more and not expect them. I thought she made a good point, though it’s hard to resist when I’m out shopping and see cute things…

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