Q: My daughter and her fiance are getting married this summer. Both are second marriages. My questions are: should she wear a wedding gown and should her attendants throw a bridal shower? Her last marriage was 13 years ago.
A: It used to be that second-time brides were advised to wear a pastel suit or, for a more formal wedding, a pastel or off-white gown. This custom dated back to earlier days when white symbolized purity or virginity – thus making it an inappropriate color for a person who already had been married. Today this is no longer the case – white is thought of as a color of joy and celebration. Therefore, your daughter may wear as beautiful a white bridal gown as she can find but it should be appropriate for her age and figure.
Your daughter’s attendants, friends, co-workers, or family members may host a shower in her honor as long as it is carefully planned. Other than a few close friends and relatives, the guest list should not include people who came to a first shower.