Open Thread

by epi on January 7, 2013

Welcome to the Etiquette Daily

This open thread is your space to use as you like. We invite you to discuss current and traditional etiquette. Feel free to ask questions of each other and the community moderators here.

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Brockwest January 7, 2013 at 5:37 pm

O.K. I’ve got a question this time:

Say you were married 20 years during the financial boom and your wife accumulated a large amount of expensive jewelry and furs, then died.

Say you remarry during the financial bust, but it doesn’t work out after 3 years. DOES the new wife have the right to take the jewelry and furs of your first wife if you’ve let her wear them, but never gave them as a gift. (It sort of makes sense to use the Diamond Drops for the Fall Ball, as they were just sitting there.)
What about jewelry and furs the next wife never even wore once?

I know what the legal side is, wondering about the etiquette/moral/fairness side.

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Winifred Rosenburg January 8, 2013 at 9:52 am

I would say if it wasn’t a gift the second wife should let her husband keep it. It was his in the first place; it never stopped being his.

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Vanna Keiler January 8, 2013 at 3:33 pm

Hi Brockwest. I agree with Winifred. If you never gave the wife the items, and understanding was clear about her only borrowing them, they should be returned to you as you request it. Clearly there is some sentimental value for you to have them, and your former wife should recognize and honor this. I hope this issue is resolved to your satisfaction.

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Brockwest January 11, 2013 at 6:26 pm

Thank you for the advice

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