1. Jerry

    Good grief. I thought we had turned the corner on the whole “does a wedding invitation require a gift” thing. It appears I was mistaken about this belief.

    I don’t know how much more plainly one can state this: receipt of a wedding invitation does not require a gift. (And no less of an authority than Miss Manners backs me up.) Getting married does not allow people to invoice their family, friends, and acquaintances.

    • Alicia

      Any invite requires only a prompt and polite RSVP! Birthday, weddings, shower, hey it is Wednesday party, whatever just RSVP promptly and politely and you have fulfilled your obligation if not attending.

      • Jody

        I’m with Jerry and Alicia here. Merely receiving an inviation does not obligate me to send a gift. If I attend I send a gift. If I’d like to attend but cannot (for whatever reason) I send a gift. If I cannot attend and wouldn’t even if I could, I don’t send a gift. In any case I respond promptly — the host deserves that courtesy.

        • Vanna Keiler

          Agree with the above sentiments, particularly scenarios Jody outlined.

          I’m guessing it was an error on EPI part to say a gift was mandatory? I understand the history behind wedding traditions (American) was in no gift being given to the bride and groom.

  2. Joanna

    If you’ve racked your brain and can’t think of who these people are, if by any chance it turns out later on that there IS some connection, this plainly says these people are not in any way “friends” – which, in my mind, is the only reason for being invited to a wedding! Thus, there is absolutely no need to obsess about the etiquette of it, or to feel you need to send a gift.

  3. Mary

    I am planning to be married next year as I complete my professional degree and will be moving out of the area for my internship. I think it would be wise if people gave me gift cards rather than gifts. How do I say something on my invitation to let people know this?

    • Congratulations on your accomplishment. I’m a bit confused – invitations to what?
      And, no, you would never ever mention gifts (much less dictate exactly how your guests spend their money) on invitations.

  4. Brockwest

    Lots of rules apply here:
    1) An invitation or mention of a wedding does not create the requirement for a gift.
    2) Invitations must never mention gifts, registries, money, money trees, money in lieu of gifts, or anything other than you are sharing you joyous occasion.
    3) It is up to the giver to decide on the gift if they chose to give one. A wedding is not a charity benefit for the marrying couple.

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