Preschool Party Pooper: When Your Child Has Too Many Invites

This post originally appeared at my parenting blog The Gift of Good Manners. I will be cross posting some of my favorite content from that blog here at the Etiquette Daily. I hope you enjoy these posts as much as I enjoyed writing them.

This morning I happened to notice today’s question on Emily Post’s Etiquette Daily, the Q & A blog of the Emily Post Institute, had to do with children’s birthday parties and thought you all might be interested. You can check out the Etiquette Daily and join the discussion by visiting I suggest searching for other questions related to children and parents by selecting the Children’s Etiquette category. Enjoy!

Q: Our 4-year-old gets invited to so many birthday parties, we can’t keep up.  Sometimes it’s for a classmate she barely knows and she’s not even eager to attend.  When is it okay to say no, and in those cases, do we have to send a gift anyway?

A: It’s fine to say no whenever you wish, and it can certainly make sense when your daughter isn’t that interested in going.  You don’t need to send a gift-just be sure to RSVP “no” to the host.  I wouldn’t turn down too many parties however.   They do provide a great chance for your daughter to get to know her classmates better.  And if “everyone” attends, after a while she may begin to feel out of the loop.

One Comment

  1. Brockwest

    It has become very common these days for young children to be invited to all birthdays of their classmates or subdivisions. Personally I would advise attending as many as you can. It is the way for your child to develop friendships and the way for you to meet other couples with similar interests and same-age children. It helps develop a circle of friends and helps prevent your child from being left out of the loop.

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