Dating Dynamics: Online dating etiquette

by epi on December 14, 2012

Q: Just for laughs, my gang of single friends and I decided to join an online dating site. But the laugh is on me- I got matched with a wonderful guy, and now I’m embarrassed to explain how we met. How can I politely avoid the subject?

A: These days, it’s very natural for couples to have met this way. There’s no reason to be ashamed about online dating!

P.S. (Post Says) How does your new partner answer the question? Any discrepancy might bring more attention, not less, to your romance’s origins. Answer the question briefly but honestly, and then move the conversation forward: “We met online and we’ve been together for eight months; I couldn’t be happier. What about you and Ben- how did you two meet?”

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Elizabeth L. December 14, 2012 at 11:01 am

I met my boyfriend online and we’ve been together for 6 months. I’m still young enough for online dating to be a fairly taboo subject, but instead of getting embarrassed, I say something like the above statement, or make a small joke out of it (the recent State Farm commercial with the “French” model always makes for a laugh). You could even say exactly what you said in your question: you did it for a laugh, but now the laugh is on you!

There’s is absolutely NOTHING to be ashamed of. And wouldn’t you rather say you met a great guy online than some stranger you picked up during a wild night out?

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Valerie December 14, 2012 at 2:46 pm

I met my husband online. 15 years ago. Trust me, there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of this way.

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Nina December 14, 2012 at 5:09 pm

This is such an interesting conversation! I live in a large multicultural city and online dating is not taboo at all. I have at least half a dozen friends who are married to folks they met online–probably more, if I thought hard about it. Elizabeth L. is right–if most people aren’t embarrassed about meeting a partner in a bar (and most aren’t, nor should they be–I did!) they shouldn’t be embarrassed about meeting someone on the internet either.

In university, we had a saying, “You see the same guys at the library as at the party!” They’re on “OK Cupid,” too!

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Brockwest December 24, 2012 at 5:44 pm

I met my wife on-line, as it’s basically the only place singles meet these days. All the social clubs of my youth have dried up from lack of participation because of the force of on-line dating.
I, too, feel a tad awkward explaining to people who haven’t had to live through the internet dating era that I met my wife on-line, so I say we met on-line, then add the explanation that it’s the main way of meeting people today as opposed to previously.
So I’ve told the truth, but given an explanation of the uninitiated.

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