Token Take-Backs: Leaving with the gift you brought

by epi on April 11, 2012

Q: My husband and I invited another couple to dinner last week, and they brought us a bottle of wine — then took the half-empty bottle home with them.  Have the rules changed, or was that rude?

A: The wine is yours!  If the rules have changed, it’s a new one on me.  An offering to a dinner host — be it a bottle of wine, a dessert, or a vase of flowers — is a gift.  Period.

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

D April 11, 2012 at 10:27 am

I can’t believe someone would do that! Maybe they thought it was BYOB? lol… crazy!


Jerry April 11, 2012 at 7:39 pm

Reminds me of the episode of Seinfeld where the Castanzas take back their marble rye from Schnitzers.


liz October 27, 2012 at 8:47 pm

I would not leave with a bottle of wine, open or not. Pop, beer, wine or anything to drink that is easy for your host to enjoy when you leave is left behind.

We have many neighborhood gatherings. If you bring a dish to pass and half or so is left at the end of a gathering, we typically grab our dish so not to bother the host with getting our crystal back, some take their plates of sweets as well, others leave them.

That is at the end of the party.

If you know you are leaving early you bring food on a non china / plastic or other plate and leave it when you leave so everyone can enjoy until the end


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