Generous Parents: How many wedding gifts are necessary

Q: We are going to pay for our daughter’s wedding this June. We also just gave her and her fiancee a sizable amount of money for their house. Are we still expected to give them a wedding gift? I’m not sure what is appropriate. Just so you know I also gave my daughter her bridal shower.

A: No, you aren’t expected to give your daughter and her fiancé a wedding gift.  It’s not uncommon for the bride’s parents’ gift to the couple to be paying for the wedding.  Many would consider the fact that you’ve also given a sizable contribution to their house fund a very generous wedding gift in itself.  Of course, you may give them an additional gift if you would like, but it is really your choice.


  1. R.

    When my husband and I were married, some of our parents gave us modest gifts in addition to sizable checks intended to help us pay for our wedding. Because I am very sentimental about family, these gifts are treasured! I bet even a modest gift, like a frame, would be a treasured keepsake for your daughter.

  2. Erica

    My parents gave us a sentimental, but not expensive, gift for our wedding. We’re Irish and Catholic so they gave us a lovely celtic cross that hangs in our house. Perhaps there is a religious emblem or some other sentimental item you could give your daughter and son-in-law as their “official” gift? If you would prefer to be more practical, offering to complete the incomplete sets of registry items (flatware, tableware, etc) is always appreciated.

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