Q: I’ve just gotten engaged and would like my college roommate to be my matron of honor but she’s in the midst of a nasty divorce. Would it be insensitive of me to ask her when my spirits are so high and hers are so low?
A: Your friend may be going through a tough time right now, but imagine how hurt she’d be if you simply excluded her from your bridal party. Start by having a heart-to-heart talk. Ask her if she’d feel comfortable being a bridesmaid during her breakup. She’ll probably accept, but your concern will give her a graceful way to decline if she wants to.
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I have a question concerning the rehearsal dinner. I know you use to pay for the wedding party and parents and grandparents, and guess out of town. But due to the way the work force is i wonder if just taking the main wedding party to dinner would be the proper thing to do. With the wedding party and there husbands, grandparents, parents, ushers, etc. we are looking at around 80 people or more. Thank You for any advice you could give me.
Lois, you certainly have a large wedding party to host at the rehearsal dinner and with out-of-town guests, too, I can understand your concern. I would suggest a frank discussion with your son and his fiancee about budget and guest list. Perhaps the dinner itself could be more casual, i.e. a barbecue or seafood buffet, so that more people could be afforded. If you possibly can, do include out-of-towners as this is the gracious thing to do for them.
Thank You so much for the feed back. Sincerely Lois Hamilton
Best wishes and congratulations to your family!