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- French Fries – How Do I Eat Them?There are many foods that present a classic dilemma for diners young and old. The question is, “fork or fingers?” The answer is sometimes definitive – you definitely eat your peas and mashed potatoes with a fork. That’s a no-brainer. But how about french fries? It’s a sometimes fingers/sometimes forks answer: If the food the […]
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- French Fries – How Do I Eat Them?
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{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
My sister-in-law just called up and informed us she and her husband would be arriving in town next Wednesday and would be staying with us for a few days. These are people we haven’t seen in 18 years. Is there a polite way to say, ‘we can’t take time off from work and I’m not leaving you alone in my house all day’?
“We are so excited to have the chance to visit with you after all these years. And, because it HAS been so long, we don’t want you to be uncomfortable at our home and so here are some hotel suggestions. We’ll look forward to seeing you Wednesday night for dinner at Rathbun’s after Jack and I are off work, and lets plan on getting together with the family on Saturday.” It is best to state your preferences as a statement rather than an open-ended question. If pressed, stand firm, saying, “I am so sorry, but I’m afraid not.” Really, though, your husband should consider spending some time outside of this with his sister. Good luck!
A friend and her family from the East Coast are vacationing and staying in a condo about fifteen minutes away from my home. Originally the plan was they were having a get together Sunday night for the people they knew in the area but their travel schedule was delayed a day & it was a challenging trip!
However, my friend did call me this last Sunday (day she arrived) when she was driving to their condo and said she would be stopping the grocery store for the BBQ later that night. I told her great and asked if would be ok if a friend of my joined the BBQ who is also from the East Coast (I don’t remember a response from her but thought it was suggested that it would be fine to have him join in…However did I make faux pas by asking if he could join us?). At any rate, I never heard from her the rest of day to even cancel the invite to BBQ and ironically my other friend ended making last minute plans with his daughter on this Sunday evening.
I called her on Monday afternoon to say that I was not surprised that I did not hear from her because of their exhausting travel from East to the West Coast (being charitable). And then I told her about my schedule this week and suggested several ideas about getting together and even for just a glass of wine as the BBQ was not necessary.
It is Tuesday morning and still no response from her. I feel my friend’s behavior is rude! I am wondering when and if she calls…should I say something…or just work into to their vacation plans. Or worst case scenario if she doesn’t call at all…says something that next time we speak by phone/email? I know friend’s sometimes fall short of our expectations. All I expected was a basic courtesy to cancel the BBQ and then to indicate that now she & her family may not be able to get together with me while on vacation…and she would possibly follow up with me later this week.
Offended….
Your friend may have been put off by your request to bring your friend, but it does sound like she was tacitly expecting you for the BBQ if she was discussing groceries for it with you. Did you perhaps misunderstand that your attendance was indeed expected?
It sounds to me like your friend is probably caught up in her vacation; afterall, a lot of social engagements are what we all sometimes need a respite from. I would say let it go for now and in a few weeks send her a chatty, upbeat note. This can be repaired if you take the benevolent high road.
Our favorite answer – “thats just not going to work for us” No further explanation is needed.
I am not clear on your response….you mean my friend should have said that “getting together” is not working for her vacation schedule? The problem for me is her invite to a BBQ and no word of cancelling…and then no feedback about re scheduling or that getting together will not work for her vacation plans.
my relative announced at Thanksgiving she and her boyfriend were expecting a baby in May. They are both 36 yrs old and have never been married. They do not live with one another. In the middle of January he proposed. At the beginning of February we received a wedding invite and gift registry. The wedding is next week, followed by the baby shower in 3 weeks. Are we expected to give Wedding presents on such a short, wedding engagement? Am I being mean thinking they were being “tacky” asking for wedding gifts?
I am sure this couple hopes that their friends and family are happy they are getting married, particularly under these pressing conditions. The length of an engagement does not determine whether a gift is given, but familial affection does.
I am collecting RSVPs for a 60th surprise birthday party. Many people have left messages for me stating that they are coming. Should I be calling these people back to acknowledge their message, or does the voicemail stand alone?
Thank you
You do not need to respond to their response unless their response was unclear.