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How should I handle a situation where a person is saying hateful things about certain groups of people (gays, African Americans, Muslims, Jews, etc.)? These situations make me uncomfortable and I don’t know what I should say to at least get them to stop talking in this manner.
Thank you.
The type of language that you are talking about is simply unacceptable and is illegal in some circumstances. If your question is a general one about what to do when this type of situation arises I say leave or confront the issue depending on the situation. Silence can be interpreted as consent and you don’t want to be associated with this type of behavior.
If this is happening regularly at your work it can create an untenable work environment and you should alert someone who has the authority to deal with the situation. This might be a supervisor, boss, or someone in HR. If your boss is the one doing it and you don’t feel like you can talk to him or her about it I would speak to a lawyer. The same advice applies if this is happening in another public place. If this is at a business, club, house of worship, or other communal gathering place I would find the person or people who are in charge of establishing the rules for the venue and let them know about the unacceptable behavior. It is their job to deal with it.
If this person is a friend or family member, you might be the one who has to talk them about the unacceptable behavior. Choose a time when this has not just happened. Explain in a calm manner how certain behavior or language makes you feel and ask the person to refrain from that type of speech around you.
I wish you the best as you deal with a tough issue.