Q: The couple next door has a big dog, and they sometimes let him run free. I’m worried about my two small kids but don’t want to get off on the wrong foot with my new neighbors. What should I do?
A: This is the perfect excuse to converse with your new neighbors. Grab some baked goodies, flowers, or a bottle of wine, and go introduce yourself. Bring your children along, too–that way, they can meet the dog, and the couple will see how small the kids are. After chatting, ask your neighbors if they’d mind keeping their pet on the leash while the kids are outside. It’s always better to discuss potential problems before a dangerous situation occurs or escalates.
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{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
As the owner of a large (and very friendly) dog, I’m always offended when it’s assumed that just because my dog is big, it is dangerous.
I’d find an instant request to keep the dog on leash around the kids to be quite insulting.
Perhaps a better tack would be if the writer ask her neighbours if they’d mind showing her kids how to act appropriately around the dog – a bit of awareness on these kids’ part will certainly serve them well, not only with the neighbours’ dog, but with ALL dogs.
It is a great idea to talk with kids about how to behave with dogs before they find themselves in a situation where they are dealing with one. It can be a very positive experience for kids to visit with a friendly dog and learn the right ways to approach and treat a dog. This is a skill that will indeed serve them well.
Jen
I love dogs, and grew up with them around. I like your suggestion to educate the kids about dogs, but I also must point out that any size off-lease dog is considered a danger to my child. Dogs are excitable in general, and could knock my 2 year old over, or just scare her. Think about how a 9 foot dog would look to you and that is how a big dog appears to a small child. Please do not take offense if I am trying to protect my own child.
Michelle
Michelle, dogs are certainly excitable. And drunks get behind the wheel, and gunshots go where they shouldn’t, and sometime people don’t wash their hands and contaminate enough food to kill people.
My point about the dog goes to a bigger issue: you can not force all dogs to be on a leash (or prevent any other potential dangers) nor should you be able to.
Sure it would be nice if everyone acted in a way that was perfectly safe for everyone else. But assuming you can request everyone change their behaviours because your child *could* be frightened or injured is just folly.
I still think the best way to protect your child is teaching her how to protect herself.
Jen, dogs might have to be on a leash off their owners’ property if the municipality has a bylaw controlling this. My city has such a bylaw, and there are certain parks designated as “off-leash” areas where dogs do not have to be on a leash. However, they must still be under their owners’ control (ex: responding to verbal commands). So for the writer, I’d suggest that she checks if her city/town has such a bylaw.
I think I have a right to request politely that my neighbours keep the dog leashed when it’s off their property, *especially* if their dog wanders onto my property where my children are playing. It is your right to be offended if you choose, but it’s my duty as a parent to keep my children safe. If making a polite request is needed, then it shall be done (especially when we’re on our property).
Personally, I would choose to use a three-prong approach: 1) supervise my kids to play inside our fenced yard; 2) research the bylaw; and 3) speak to my neighbour.
This approach sounds quite reasonable.