1. Sarah

    I was reading your Etiquette guide yesterday, as I am planning my wedding. My fiance wants to have two junior groomsmen, but I couldn’t find the proper place for junior groomsmen in the processional. It would seem a bit intimidating to have them come in first before the regular groomsmen, but not very aesthetic to have them come in after. Where do junior groomsmen belong in the processional?

    • Randy Strauss

      I don’t know if this is correct, but I can tell you what a friend of mine did at her wedding.

      They placed the groom’s two nephews after the Best Man / Maid of Honor and before the rest of the Groomsmen / Bridesmaids. That way, the boys weren’t intimidated at having to walk down the aisle first, had an example to watch before they were let loose down the aisle, and the following Groomsmen were there to keep the boys from being distracted.


  2. Melody Harrison

    I made gifts for my co-workers for Christmas. My boss gave me the most wonderful compliments in the thank you card she gave me – both personal and professional compliments. Is it appropriate to thank her for her compliments in her thank-you card to me?

      • Randy Strauss

        I believe it would be a bit redundant to respond with a formal thank you card in response to her thank you card, if that’s what you were thinking. Graceandhonor, has it correct, I believe. A simple, face-to-face, comment on how much you appreciated her kind words is appropriate.

  3. robert Wittenstein

    My mother has been disabled with Multiple Scleroses and has required an increasing level of in-home care over the years. After working for my family for almost 20 years, one of our two care-givers is retiring. She is hinting that a monetary retirement gift is appropriate. Is there a guide for what is appropriate?

    • Graceandhonor

      This is dependent upon many factors: was she your employee or an agency employee? If an agency employee, did the agency fund any retirement? We hope she has a retirement plan in place by now. I’d suggest speaking with your CPA or the agency if there is one, or if not, call one and ask their opinion. At a minimum, I’d think one week’s pay for each year of service, but if she has no other retirement income source, this will be woefully inadequate. A person who cared for your mother 20 years is certainly deserving of a substantial amount.

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