Comments on: Which Wedding?: When to give a gift http://www.etiquettedaily.com/2009/12/which-wedding-when-to-give-a-gift/ Tue, 07 Feb 2012 15:10:38 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Graceandhonor http://www.etiquettedaily.com/2009/12/which-wedding-when-to-give-a-gift/#comment-1388 Graceandhonor Wed, 17 Mar 2010 19:39:43 +0000 http://www.etiquettedaily.com/?p=1477#comment-1388 The bride was being inclusive and well-mannered in reaching out to you with an invitation and while you cannot attend, it would be gracious to send a gift. How much you spend is up to you and contingent on several factors...do you know her well? Would you like to? Will you be in-laws someday? How crazy are you about your boyfriend? Do you want to demonstrate your warm and caring nature to him? Can you come up with an imaginative gift that also watches your budget? At the minimum, write a warm note to the hostess to decline the invitation, and one to the bride expressing your regrets at not being able to spend the fun day with her. The bride was being inclusive and well-mannered in reaching out to you with an invitation and while you cannot attend, it would be gracious to send a gift. How much you spend is up to you and contingent on several factors…do you know her well? Would you like to? Will you be in-laws someday? How crazy are you about your boyfriend? Do you want to demonstrate your warm and caring nature to him? Can you come up with an imaginative gift that also watches your budget?

At the minimum, write a warm note to the hostess to decline the invitation, and one to the bride expressing your regrets at not being able to spend the fun day with her.

]]> By: MRM http://www.etiquettedaily.com/2009/12/which-wedding-when-to-give-a-gift/#comment-1387 MRM Sun, 14 Mar 2010 06:21:36 +0000 http://www.etiquettedaily.com/?p=1477#comment-1387 I was invited to my boyfriend's brother's fiance's bridal shower as a "token" invitation since she knows I live several states away and can't attend. Am I obligated to send a gift? How much should I spend? I was invited to my boyfriend’s brother’s fiance’s bridal shower as a “token” invitation since she knows I live several states away and can’t attend. Am I obligated to send a gift? How much should I spend?

]]> By: Graceandhonor http://www.etiquettedaily.com/2009/12/which-wedding-when-to-give-a-gift/#comment-1386 Graceandhonor Wed, 20 Jan 2010 02:16:55 +0000 http://www.etiquettedaily.com/?p=1477#comment-1386 If the purpose of this gathering is to fete the wedding couple, then it stands to reason those in attendance should know them. However, if your friends would add to the enthusiasm of the evening, I see nothing wrong with including them, if you mention to the bride you'd like to invite them. Some brides will be gracious and enthusiastic about meeting new people, while others will not. Or, if your friends will be there to help you host, then the bride should be all for it. You'll just want to be sure that your friends are not going to feel like, or be viewed as, interlopers. If the purpose of this gathering is to fete the wedding couple, then it stands to reason those in attendance should know them. However, if your friends would add to the enthusiasm of the evening, I see nothing wrong with including them, if you mention to the bride you’d like to invite them. Some brides will be gracious and enthusiastic about meeting new people, while others will not. Or, if your friends will be there to help you host, then the bride should be all for it. You’ll just want to be sure that your friends are not going to feel like, or be viewed as, interlopers.

]]> By: martha http://www.etiquettedaily.com/2009/12/which-wedding-when-to-give-a-gift/#comment-1385 martha Wed, 20 Jan 2010 01:18:33 +0000 http://www.etiquettedaily.com/?p=1477#comment-1385 The bride and her mother have supplied a guest list for a wedding party. It will be a large dinner gathering. If the hosts would like to add a couple personal friends to the invitation list, is this acceptable? Do they need to know the bride and groom to be included in the party? What are the guidelines here? The bride and her mother have supplied a guest list for a wedding party. It will be a large dinner gathering. If the hosts would like to add a couple personal friends to the invitation list, is this acceptable? Do they need to know the bride and groom to be included in the party? What are the guidelines here?

]]> By: Graceandhonor http://www.etiquettedaily.com/2009/12/which-wedding-when-to-give-a-gift/#comment-1384 Graceandhonor Mon, 18 Jan 2010 17:15:18 +0000 http://www.etiquettedaily.com/?p=1477#comment-1384 Leave it out. A guest for a wedding buffet party should not receive anything that resembles a solicitation for gifts to this event, as gifts are not given at buffet parties, and the enclosure you mention would be interpreted that way. Leave it out. A guest for a wedding buffet party should not receive anything that resembles a solicitation for gifts to this event, as gifts are not given at buffet parties, and the enclosure you mention would be interpreted that way.

]]> By: martha http://www.etiquettedaily.com/2009/12/which-wedding-when-to-give-a-gift/#comment-1383 martha Mon, 18 Jan 2010 17:04:26 +0000 http://www.etiquettedaily.com/?p=1477#comment-1383 I can understand putting your bridal registry information on a wedding shower party invitation. But, what about on a wedding buffet party invitation? That sounds coarse to me. I don't want to overlook an opportunity to get that information out for the couple. Should we put a loose insert with this information as a courtesy to the couple? Or leave it out entirely? Please advise. I can understand putting your bridal registry information on a wedding shower party invitation. But, what about on a wedding buffet party invitation? That sounds coarse to me. I don’t want to overlook an opportunity to get that information out for the couple. Should we put a loose insert with this information as a courtesy to the couple? Or leave it out entirely? Please advise.

]]> By: Graceandhonor http://www.etiquettedaily.com/2009/12/which-wedding-when-to-give-a-gift/#comment-1382 Graceandhonor Mon, 14 Dec 2009 19:05:14 +0000 http://www.etiquettedaily.com/?p=1477#comment-1382 The four of you may send one gift together. The bride should have sent invitations to the two households as that is proper, but you then would have been obligated to send two gifts. However, if you wish to send your own, that is certainly fine and generous. The four of you may send one gift together. The bride should have sent invitations to the two households as that is proper, but you then would have been obligated to send two gifts. However, if you wish to send your own, that is certainly fine and generous.

]]> By: M. Passy http://www.etiquettedaily.com/2009/12/which-wedding-when-to-give-a-gift/#comment-1381 M. Passy Sun, 13 Dec 2009 03:45:28 +0000 http://www.etiquettedaily.com/?p=1477#comment-1381 I'm currently living a funny situation with my cousin and her wedding gift. Regardless of the situation, Is it ok, to send only one present if my husband and I are included in the same invitation with my mother and brother even if we don't live together? I’m currently living a funny situation with my cousin and her wedding gift. Regardless of the situation, Is it ok, to send only one present if my husband and I are included in the same invitation with my mother and brother even if we don’t live together?

]]>