Open thread

by EPI Staff on December 4, 2009

Welcome to Etiquette Daily

This open thread is your space to use as you like.  We invite you to discuss current and traditional etiquette. Feel free to ask questions of each other and the community moderators here.

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Marney December 11, 2009 at 12:13 pm

Just purchased and am still reading the 17th edition of Etiquette. Love It! Thank you for pages 291 & 292 “Politely Squelching Boors.” Although the woman in our office building, rather small office building, is a boor and does not takes any of the hints, what do we do now? We simply say good morning to her and never ever ask her how she is. However, she insists on giving reports on her medical ailments, whether real or otherwise and continues to soak up our time, every single day. Some of us refuse to dine with her any longer as the finger cleaning of her dentures at the dinner table is repulsive. If she is not taking the hints, what is the next step to handle the boor?

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Graceandhonor December 15, 2009 at 5:46 am

If you’ve truly tried politely to deflect her tales of woe, each of you should adopt a standard response; by hearing it repeatedly, it should eventually dawn upon her that you all have united in worn-out indifference. “It must be awful to be sick all the time,” and walk away.

As for denture cleaning at the table, simply gather your tray, say “Excuse me” and leave immediately. Again, repeated and consistent reaction may be necessary. Much like an adult teaching a wayward child, calm, kindly persistence will have more lasting results than dramatic over-reaction. An astute adult will also recognize that poor behavior is often to be pitied.

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