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{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
I recently re-connected with an old friend from high school. She’s planned a “girl’s weekend” at her home in another state for 6-8 of us. My sister and I are flying in and renting a car. Being raised as nice, Southern girls, we are both planning to bring hostess gifts.
I’m concerned that because the function is very casual and is the third event of its kind, that no other guests will bring gifts. My sister is afraid that we’ll “show up” the other guests.
Should we take the gifts or not?
Absolutely, you should take something; perhaps these items could be something the group would enjoy together i.e. foodstuffs (cheese/crackers/nuts etc.), wine, margarita makings, votive candles, disposable cameras to record the fun, Pictionary…whatever your friends like; I’m sure you’ll be asked back!
I have three, small children who are indulged by my parents and have too many toys, games, stuffed animals, etc.
We’re having one, big birthday party for them this year and would like to suggest that guests make a donation to St. Jude’s, Ronald McDonald House or Shriner’s in lieu of a gift.
How can I communicate that without seeming rude or presumptuous?
This is a time I’d mention gifts on the invitation, or in an enclosed note…”Dear ___, Our children are so blessed to have you as their generous (grandparents, aunt etc.) and you have been so very good to us. There are so many other children that do not have such wonderful (grandparents, aunt etc.) and because our children have more than they can possibly use, please give a donation to the charity of your choice, perhaps St. Jude’s or R McDonald House, in lieu of gifting the kids for their birthday. We look forward to the gift of your presence at their party. Much love, Sally.” This should be a handwritten note, not printed.
If, though, the grandparents still gift your children, let it go.
What a wonderful response. Might I suggest refining the line “There are so many other children that do not have such wonderful (grandparents, aunt etc.) and…” to something like “There are so many other children who are not so fortunate…”.
I’m sure there are many wonderful grandparents out there who are not in the position to give such gifts, giving can be rich in many ways.
Dear Craig,
I absolutely concur with your point; my reason for stating it as I did was to
soothe the ego of the grandparents in this situation, thereby hopefully receiving
their enthusiastic response.