Q: Recently, my 17-year-old daughter attended her prom, and her date was surprised that she expected him to pay for everything. When I was in high school, boys always paid. Have the rules changed?
A:It is confusing to figure out who should do what these days when it comes to dating and customs-and it’s all the more complicated with a pricey prom factored into the mix! Boys don’t always pay. The standard still holds that whoever extends the inviation picks up the tab-and since it’s become acceptable for a girl to ask a boy out on a date, she may be the one asking for the check too. But when it comes to attending expensive events, practicality takes the lead, and girls and boys often both chip in. That’s the case with proms, which have become real extravaganzas. In many communities, students plan for the evening far in advance, and sometimes get part time jobs just to earn extra money to cover expenses. That way, couples can afford to share the cost of this big-ticket event.
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I vote for green, group prom attendance. Girls remake vintage prom dresses, couples all chip in for a single limo, dinner is at someone’s home rather than a pricey restaurant, and the (incomprehensible to moi) hotel room is eschewed for an after-prom gathering at someone’s home. There is a sweetness about this mode, and we should encourage our teenagers toward it; we can still be the leaders in our families and set limits on their prom plans. Parents, stand-up, be strong, unite!
yey, try that on your teenager, but try that on your teenager’s friends and their parents? I wish it were that easy!